Welcome to The Duncan Trussell Family Hour Center for Self-Optimization

Register now to gain access to all of our features. Once registered and logged in, you will be able to contribute to this site by submitting your own content or replying to existing content. You'll be able to customize your profile, receive reputation points as a reward for submitting content, while also communicating with other members via your own private inbox, plus much more! This message will be removed once you have signed in.

noizemonk

Hrair
  • Content count

    83
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    2

Community Reputation

63 Purple Pope

2 Followers

About noizemonk

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  1. I asked for a plate and you delivered a feast. My thanks!
  2. Popes etc, do any of you hail from Denver or Colorado at large? My wife and I are taking a spontaneous trip in a month and a half and I'm hoping to get some inside data on what gems the garden hides. If you are a native or just well travelled, I value your experience and advice. What would you recommend? Arts, music, spirituality/magical spaces, booze, food (veggie a plus), junkshops, books etc. Hiking, natural beauty. High weirdness always welcome. Thank you!
  3. Today the word "microguilt" came to me as I was driving. I couldn't find it in a search, and I have no idea if it's an established concept under another name. Since it popped into my mind and intrigued me, I thought I’d craft a personal definition. So what does it mean? Well I’m very familiar with guilt, being a human raised in a Judeochristian family in flyover country. But I do not refer to the overt guilt we feel after doing harm, whether as the result of an unfortunate accident or an act of ill will. I do not refer to the engineered guilt that is installed by so many religions as a means of control. To me, “microguilt” refers to a different kind of remorse. This is the voice of conditioning, but coming to you from inside your mind. In each of our minds rattles a thousand nagging background thoughts from childhood and experience in society that we have all allowed to become institutions. We believe them to be true, so when they come from inside, we feel compelled to trust them. They seemed true to somebody, but they may not be true to you in your unique experience. To indulge in microguilt is to beat yourself up for or push yourself to act on impulses which you have magnified in your perception. Think of each instance of microguilt as a single buzzing fly in an otherwise serene room. It's tiny, but enough of a distraction to throw off concentration. Microguilt leads to a spiral effect as it activates tangents and these rapidly cluster up. The silver lining of this idea is that if you truly are plagued by a cloud of mental pests, each one should be considerably more surmountable on its own. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed if you see countless distractions and distortions. With the microguilt model, rather than being outnumbered, you can take it one moment, one thought at a time. As overplayed an image as it is, the trope of the slow-motion bullets from The Matrix is apt here. Why dodge a hail of gunfire when you can move around individual bullets? In a state of contemplation you are faced not with a barrage of pressures but with a choice of which of your obstacles to confront in the moment. With concentration and patient effort you can easily rid yourself of these little phantom flies one at a time until you are restored to a clean room to think once more. Imagine the serenity of a cool evening, undisturbed and able to stretch your mind to fit the dimensions of your imagination rather than having it jumbled around a tiny delusion or distraction. Your life can be your own rather than a parade of Pavlovian responses. What will you do with your full mental power restored? This is especially important for activists of all stripes. The world you confront with your actions is dark and filled with vampiric energies. Their greatest entertainment is to siphon the energy you might spend defeating them into fretting over the bleak circumstances of a world run by criminally insane primates with a lust for power. To serve your world, you must serve well yourself enough to stay in your best shape, both mentally and physically. The old expression “do no harm, but take no shit” applies here. It is okay to destroy thought parasites. They’re already doing it to you. How many times have you sabotaged good work by getting mired in your own holographc hellhole? Divide and conquer is the oldest trick in the book. We’ve seen it time and time again with the FBI’s COINTELPRO and the plainclothes cops inciting violence in peaceful protests. It is a problem people tend to generate in groups, but it is encouraged and amplified by media, politicians and people of influence. It keeps the people tied up in ridiculous arguments over fallacies and the people in power laughing all the way to the offshore bank. Your efforts to organize and change the systems you rail against and seek to improve or replace will fail if these divisions destroy communities of change, and you will not be up to par as part of the work if you are divided within yourself. When you learned to walk, it took constant, total attention. You needed to learn how to use your muscles and joints in tandem to maintain balance over shifting terrain. It took you weeks and months of practice. You had a lot of accidents and maybe you even messed yourself up a bit. It was all part of the process. When you learned to think, I’m afraid, it wasn’t the same. From birth to age seven we are a combination of sponges and echo chambers. About three years in we start to string together things we’ve heard intomeaningful statements that reflect the moment, but we’re still playing parrot for a while. It is about this time that our desire for independence becomes rebellion. This instinct will serve us for life, even if it drives our parents to the limits of their patience and sanity. The problem with all that sponging is that we absorb gigabytes of data that may not all be that helpful to us. There is a fierce effort to create brand loyalty from birth on. There are loud voices attempting to force certain behaviors. We experience the reruns of our parents’ trauma and any static in the dynamics of our home life transfers to us because we are forming our definitions of reality. We carry this for life. With great effort we can undo zombie behavior and reprogram ourselves to react with flexibility and intelligence. It’s not easy. It must be done over and over. Yet it can be done. One way to look at thoughts is not to see them as the sky, but only as clouds. Your awareness is always there, as is the sky. The thoughts come and go, spawning as dust and water collide and collude. They block the light of pure awareness temporarily, yet they are nowhere near as solid as they appear. Of course not all thoughts are bad, but so many of them come uninvited and make themselves very awkward guests. When you feel invaded, remember that both thoughts and clouds are mainly empty space, and are by their very nature ephemeral. I’m learning to treat them as events within my mind rather than my mind itself. It’s a process that requires nearly constant vigilance, but it is beginning to become more natural and automatic. When I make the effort, I feel the relief. In time, I hope to see it become second nature. I hope the same for you. We all deserve to know our real power. You can’t necessarily prevent negative thoughts, but I would encourage you to take the wheel of your reactions when you can. I know introspection feels like a luxury in our hyper-aware, always-on world of information, but it’s one you can afford. Meditation, stripped of all the trappings that have been attached to it over the centuries and especially lately, is really just the practice of learning how you think and what you need. You can do this anywhere, and any time that you’re able to get some privacy. Let yourself think as you will, but keep watch. When a thought appears, be honest with yourself about whether or not it is useful to you. Does it serve you, or does it steal your attention from more useful purposes? If it serves you, let it do so, but if it is a thief, kick it out before it loots the till. It’s difficult to keep this up all the time, and nobody could really be expected to, but keep your inner eye out for bad habits. Parasites of the body steal the best parts of food before the body can digest it. Parasites of the mind do the same for our cognitive bandwidth. The less energy you allow to be drained off by these parasitic thoughts, the more you’ll have for doing what you really need and want to do in life to be happier. When you start to feel the creepy crawl of unclean spirits in your mind, keep this simple banishing ritual in mind: 1. Take 3 very deep breaths with a pause between them. 2. Picture the thought as a mosquito, then zoom your perspective out until it goes from looming large to hardly visible. 3. Thank it for its service. If it has a point, take some action. If not, dismiss the message. 4. Picture it surrounded by blue lightning, like those old bug zappers. 5. Breathe out deeply, releasing the "smoke" of the incinerated pest. 6. Breathe in deeply, filling the space it held with oxygen. 7. Reconsider where you are in your mental space. Are there more mental mosquitoes keeping you from being at a place of peace? If so, repeat 1-6. Think of this as spraying for psychic pests. You wash your hands when you’ve been in public, so wash your own brain when you get to a place where you can do the work Just as a certain amount of viruses and physical parasites can’t be avoided in daily life, the same is true of their mental counterparts. We’re surrounded by messages that are designed specifically to lodge in the mind and multiply. From Edward Bernays to modern days, propaganda is everywhere, and has been perfected. A growing number of us can see and reject it in its common forms, but indoctrination runs deep. From childhood we are encouraged to associate pleasure with brands and their ubiquitous logos. Earworms and commercials are blasted at us from television, radio, stores, gas pumps, and damn near every corner of the internet. A certain kind of hygiene and medicine are required for the pests of the body, and so it is with the mind. Practice makes ease.
  4. Great wisdom in the above for fathers of all ages! Fatherhood will crack your heart all the way open and drag you into immediacy, and if you embrace that you will encounter the kingdom. You will also be driven mad at times by insomnia and the frustration that comes from caring for a being with many needs and few ways to communicate. But it will get better, and it is all worth it. Build in an outlet for stress, so you do not carry it with you. You are a guardian now. Protector of the new body, teacher of the new mind, and disciplinarian of the new ego when the time comes. You are your mate's rock, for strong as she is all of us need a firm foundation of support. This will be terrifying and wonderful and you will grow into it and shock yourself with hindsight in a few years. Now some practical stuff. There is an enormous bounty of gently used baby furniture and clothes. Don't spend a ton of money on new stuff because it will get wrecked, but find sturdy stuff. Look for used gear in "upper class" zip codes, as the quality has to be high to resell but prices are much better than new. Avoid electronic toys for a while. Babies are fascinated by the details of simple things. Old school musical and wooden toys do well. Get an idea together what you want and then bring home fun and practical surprises. There are many ways to be a hunter. I don't know what y'all will do, but we did lots of holding, skin to skin. Building that base of security. We did co-sleep in bed for 3 months, then 3 months in a pack n play in our room, then transitioned to crib. Plan ahead to get a twin bed because they grow fast and may be ready by 2.5 or so. Get the baby monitor now. I don't advocate forcing a diet on a kiddo. I will say though that we were religious about veggies and vitamins supplements in late pregnancy and carried through with mostly veg right up to now. My daughter towers over kids her age and has a photographic memory, incredible energy. Food processors help because you can make your own. Those squeeze packs will save your life too. But that's years off. It'll be milk for a while. Dunno how mum feels about breast milk but if she wants to go that route, find her a pump now, and help her stockpile a bunch of frozen milk to make her life easier. Worth it for a compact freezer if you can spare the room. You'll want the storage bags that go right in a bottle. Medela makes good shit that holds up. Help her with as much of the logistics of this as you can, the pumping is enough work as it is. Please, ask anything. It takes a village and this is a good one.
  5. 93, Traveler. I'm glad it is of service. I'm thinking of producing an audio version.
  6. "Play from your fucking heart!" But to be real I've got a 3.5 year old so I remember pregnancy forward and my initiation process (ongoing, of course) is pretty easy to reference. You're going to be great and find new depths and power and be humbled and healed. Context alleviates anxiety. AMA, brother.
  7. @duncanThank you from the bottom of my heart for this wonderful interview. I've been working on something like self-authoring program privately (in an esoteric game manual format) and I got very excited when I heard about it. I looked on a whim and the program was at a massive discount for a pair. So now my wife and I are doing the self-authoring program. You're saving and improving the quality of countless lives with your work, @duncan Dinner's on me if you're ever in AZ.
  8. @Thinkstoomuch We are not the first. We're going to get it right this time.
  9. My thanks for the electronic nudge good sir.
  10. Well I must say I fucking loved that. Thank you.
  11. We are embodiments of and participants in a mystery beyond our comprehension. All certainty does is cram infinity into a matchbox. In good time, we all come to realize that we all have our own spiritual bullshit, and that it's all part of self-discovery. If it isn't harmful, there's no real use beyond self-satisfaction in dogging other people's belief systems. Folks tend to switch up their own anyway when experience creates doubt or curiosity. As Conficious said, "Don't start no shit, won't be no shit."
  12. Glad to hear that! Thank you man.
  13. Once upon a time, the wealthy would-be elite hired alchemists to toil in their basements in the hopes of free gold. Now, the seekers of truth toil in their own kind of solitude, uncovering their own depths and facets as they discover and explore the occult and ignored worlds within the meme-mesh of linguistic spells and behavioral conditioning that passes for consensus reality. What slithers just outside our peripheral vision is a world of injustice, horror and depravity that sickens the soul and begs the question, what can we actually do? Fight, yes, of course, but how? Before we play at being knights we have to understand the quest that calls us. First, one notices The Program of the Outer Game and feels its slowly-acting poison, then one rebels and lashes out with fire and lightning. Galleries, libraries, and record stores are filled with the often beautiful and empowering results of this urge. Yet after its initial thrill, rage only exhausts us and creates ripples of new harm that amuse The Adversary. Some never leave this Dantean cycle, but some begin the dance of initiation and realization. In time it is these who seek to change the code of the Outer Game itself. We can all choose to go from played, to player, to programmer. The seasoned Hermetic axiom "as above, so below; so within, so without" served the alchemists of old and it can serve us today. The journey from slave of circumstance to sovereign co-author of the universe is a life-long walk uphill, but when the fog of mesmerism parts, we find it is the only path there is to walk if we take freedom seriously. The Inner Game must be mastered to shift the variables of its worldly counterpart. The mantle of the Great Work we have taken up and dusted off unfolds through the various works that we all do, unsung though they may be. It is the doing that matters, the persistence that pays. The dark gnosis oscillating beneath the veneer of the Verbal Hologram can be exhausting, even consumptive to behold and accept. There many are trapped and dissolved by the carnivorous vortices of despair. As angels told us when we were on speaking terms, "be not afraid." Apocalypse has come to mean sure doom, but its true meaning is a time of unveiling and change. Revelation is terrifying and wonderful. As we dig and expose and bring to light, it's good to be reminded to serve and heal self in order to serve others and combat Our Situation, The Con, The Adversary. We each recognize the Hydra differently from our own perspective and we each feel called to sever the head nearest to us in the hope of more freedom for all. We must, however, take the wise old advice of Nietzsche and avoid becoming monsters ourselves as we fight the Beast, through sins of omission that make us less than who we are. The first thing to do is to honor your body. In a time when we are being tugged at by the gravity of immersive technology it is ever more easy to forget the actual feeling and needs of physical life. It is therefore a radical act indeed to resist the cultural siren song and take damn good care of yourself. The flesh is the interface of all our work and we are often quick to take it for granted. The service we are called to requires us to be our best. The sound mind requires the healthy brain, and the brain requires certain things of the body to work at its true potential. Your human vehicle may seem common or flawed to you but it is very special and very demanding. Do not get mired in guilt and regret. You already know where you have slipped and where you can strive, but let us visit a few suggestions to remind you. Drink water. It sounds simple, but many of you may be drinking lots of coffee to dig and lots of booze to forget. Both will rob you of water. Hydrate sufficiently and be sure to replenish your electrolytes. A good rule of thumb goal for daily water intake is to take half your weight in pounds and use that number of ounces. It will seem like a lot, but as you pass on soft and hard drinks in favor of water more and more, you'll feel the difference. Filter it as you're able, for Lord knows the tap is a gamble. Take magnesium in water if you can, as it calms the nervous system. You are what you eat, so eat as well as you're able. Whole foods (meaning fruit/veg/grain/nuts etc rather than processed, not the chain store) will deliver the purest and most sustaining energy. There's a combination that will work for you and you owe it to yourself to find it. The less processed, the closer to vitality and the further from the well of toxicity and addictions which beget illness and dependence on drugs. It's all your choice, but the less you feed from the animal kingdom, the less suffering you send into the pain collectors that feed the demons of this world, and the less you diminish yourself with the resonance of the abattoir. Keep up with your vitamin C and zinc to stave off the ubiquitous viruses. Clean fats like MCT oil will give you more and better energy than processed carbs. To be an alpha, get your omegas. Rebuild your gut biome and watch your cognition and intuition rebuild themselves and grow. Finally, eat your greens. Get out and get moving. Shake your heart and lungs to life with activity. Go anywhere, but go. Have a walk or a ride around the block as often as you can. Fresh air, natural light, blood flow, and stimulus unrelated to the mystery that plagues your mind will all recharge you. Tearing veils and processing what is revealed can be very taxing, and we must give ourselves a break between digs to stay fresh and useful. Whether those that eat your pain are the archons of the Gnostic lore, the demons of the Church, or the 0.01% Wendigo Class of vulture capitalism, they all depend on burnout and collapse in those who would expose them. Starve them with your grace. This will seem hardest: get enough sleep. Insomnia haunts many an investigator and activist. Whatever dreams may come, take the hints, but keep your sense of humor. Balance the nightmare fuel with something light, even funny before bed. Laughter clears the soul of ghosts. Relaxation is as much a need as oxygen. Do as much as you can to reset the mind and prepare it for rest. White noise or calm music will help. Soma FM is full of useful material for this and runs 24/7. I recommend the "Drone Zone" station. They're worth supporting, as are all that increase the calm in this frenetic world. The most punk rock, righteous thing you can do in a destructive culture (and ours at the moment is an empire of death cloaked in lip service to virtue, make no mistake) is to be creative. Your voice is the one that needs to be heard. Keep adding truth to the conversation in person and online, but also, create. You may make the art that saves a life, and if nothing else it may save yours. Take time to express all that is building inside you. Transmute the poison, or just drain it off. The alchemists were playing with fire for better reasons than minting gold. There are bacteria that eat radiation. Life adapts and loves to redeem its obstacles. Learn to smile at and accept your pain before burning it for light. When you are overwhelmed, that is the moment to show yourself love immediately and do what must be done to ground yourself. Again, I urge you to explore meditation, yoga, or benign magick if you're so inclined (banishing rituals are a great idea). Also, do truly random acts of kindness. People open like flowers when they're seen and served. Explore your best and worst aspects. Write down your rambling thoughts, especially the hideous. Get the shadow out where you can see it. Learn what you can from its point of view, and dismiss it politely. Fill the space it leaves with love. You'll never run out of room. Day must always dance with night, but out of darkness cometh light. To quote another hoping to inspire those who fight darkness, "Do not lose heart. We were made for these times." We can all feel the tremors building. The towers are tipping. The Kingdom is within us. Babylon is nervous. This is it. Don't give up. Thank you all, strangers and friends alike for your work and to @duncanfor this sanctuary. Good journey, fellow travelers.
  14. @CharlemagneMost gracious and appreciated!
  15. What advice would y'all have for an ex-"tourist" in these matters looking to return with respect for set/setting/substance but unsure how to proceed in terms of acquisition?